暖冬cool夏

这里一年四季温暖如春,没有酷暑没有严寒......
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The 12th Pair of Shoes

(2021-11-15 20:09:10) 下一个

Months ago, on the way to find a new trail, I overheard over the car radio the latter half of an inspiring story, which I relayed to my daughter when she was home. 

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A black mom, in raising her black girl, has been telling her to always keep her head up but her mouth shut.

Sitting in the classroom one normal school day, she was facing the questions from her teacher.

“What does your mom do?”

Remembering her mom’s word, the little girl answered timidly that she did not know.

Then the topic somehow switched to the shoes the girl was going to wear to school. The girl told the teacher that she had ten pairs of shoes, describing each in details the colors and styles.

One day, the girl wore a pair of shoes that was not in her list. The teacher saw it, looked into the girl’s eyes, and said coldly: “You didn’t tell me that you have this.”

The girl was intimidated and lowered her head, as if she was doing something wrong.

Back at home, she told her mom what happened that day at school. The mom was enraged. "That’s ridiculous!”burst out the mom. The girl looked at her mom, not sure if it was her that her mom was mad at.

“It’s none of her business!” Holding her little girl’s hand by one side, and with a handbag in another, the mom stormed out the door. Not knowing where her mom was taking her, or if it’s the school they were going to, the girl followed her mom fearfully. They came to the bustling main street, and stopped in front of Saks 5th Avenue. The mom went straight into the shoe department and picked a pair of yellow-colored shoes that cost almost $100.

The next morning, the mom asked the little girl to put on the new shoes, and told her:

“You go and tell the teacher that you actually have a dozen pairs of shoes.”

The girl did accordingly. She walked up to the teacher and showed her her 12th pair of shoes. The teacher, stone-faced, looked at the shiny bright new shoes, said nothing but: "Go and sit down.”

Of course, the mom knew that soon the little girl's feet would outgrow all the shoes she had, but this $100 is a silent defiance, fighting for her little girl’s dignity in face of an authority. Many years later, the little girl, now grown up to be a self-esteemed lady, was telling her story over the radio, reminiscent of her proud mom and her 12 pairs of shoes.

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暖冬cool夏 回复 悄悄话 回复 '心中之城' 的评论 : 心城好! 你想得那么周到啊,谢谢你的问候! 你是太忙了静不下心来读呢。这个故事很简单,就是一个黑人母亲帮她女儿出头的故事,我也是收音机里听来的。心城的感恩节大餐一定很丰盛,我已经送去猪肚汤一碗帮助你消化:) 祝心城全家感恩节团聚开心!
心中之城 回复 悄悄话 没看懂啊!才疏学浅!暖冬翻译中文就更好了。最近超忙!要过节了!祝暖冬感恩节快乐!猪肚也可以多进补几次。。呵呵!:)
暖冬cool夏 回复 悄悄话 回复 '舒啸' 的评论 : 谢谢舒兄特意前来问候! 这个故事不知真假,我打开收音机时已经讲了一半了,这个老师也是势力眼:) 也祝舒兄全家感恩节快乐!
暖冬cool夏 回复 悄悄话 回复 '秋水天长' 的评论 : 秋水好! 这两天工作比较忙,刚刚做完可以歇口气了。今年的感恩节一点也不觉得喔,我连火鸡都不准备买了。这个故事可以说给孩子们听听的,对权威的藐视:)) 祝秋水一家感恩节团聚开心,其乐融融!
舒啸 回复 悄悄话 谢谢暖冬分享好故事。那位老师德不配位,只是记忆力令我羡慕。:-)

祝感恩节愉快!
秋水天长 回复 悄悄话 给这位妈妈点赞,太解气了,痛快!:)谢谢暖冬分享,明天女儿回来我也把这个小故事讲给她听。
问候亲爱的暖冬,预祝感恩节快乐!
暖冬cool夏 回复 悄悄话 回复 '康赛欧' 的评论 : 谢谢康康特来问候。我们小时候不仅穷,而且还不许爱美:) 那年代以朴素,补丁衣服为美。看到你的回复,你的帽子是Walmart买,看来Costco和Walmart有时候carry一样的东西。
同祝康康感恩节快乐!
康赛欧 回复 悄悄话 暖冬感恩节快乐!

跟我们小时的教育不同啊,那时只要学习好就行了,家长认为孩子太注重穿着和打扮,会影响学习。记得班里的学渣才会被歧视,而且有些学习不错的孩子会公开歧视学渣,甚至老师也是这样。还有,有些老师对家庭条件好或是有背景的孩子的态度是不一样的,这是人性,我们有时会过分解读,就会用到种族上。

暖冬cool夏 回复 悄悄话 回复 '小声音' 的评论 : 小小好! 谢谢小小惦记,我最近工作也忙,周末在加班呢,刚刚做完歇口气。小小忙吧,人还在外面,不用惦记我。马上要过节了,希望你早点回家,一家人好好团聚。谢谢小小,同问候小小全家感恩节快乐!
暖冬cool夏 回复 悄悄话 回复 '淡然' 的评论 : 谢谢淡然阅读,新周快乐,感恩节快乐!
小声音 回复 悄悄话 谢谢暖冬分享这个小故事,睿智的妈妈。
最近瞎忙,多日不见,惦念,问好暖冬,人在外,预祝暖冬感恩节快乐!:))
淡然 回复 悄悄话 暖冬分享的故事让人深思,谢谢分享!
暖冬cool夏 回复 悄悄话 回复 '山韭菜' 的评论 : 韭菜好! 我小时候也很穷,有双新鞋子穿都是很了不得的事。这位妈妈应该是条件不错的,只是我前半部分故事没有听到。谢谢韭菜阅读,周末快乐!
暖冬cool夏 回复 悄悄话 回复 'laopika' 的评论 : 谢谢Pika特意来告知,感觉上,decade比dozen要深一点,看来还是跟平时可能接触到的词汇有关。谢谢你的阅读,周末快乐!
山韭菜 回复 悄悄话 很有意思的故事!我小时候,别说12双鞋,有两双鞋的女孩,就是很富有了!问好暖冬,祝周末愉快!
laopika 回复 悄悄话 回复 '暖冬cool夏' 的评论 : decade我知道的,也会熟练运用,这个dozen确实是新的,所以读你们的博文都会有收获,谢谢!
暖冬cool夏 回复 悄悄话 回复 '燕麦禾儿' 的评论 : 燕儿好! 是的,这个母亲很骄傲,不允许女儿在学校受歧视,反击的方式也很巧妙,让老师无语以对。值此祝燕儿周末快乐,全家感恩节团聚幸福开心!
暖冬cool夏 回复 悄悄话 回复 'laopika' 的评论 : Pika好! 是的,有这样一个词 dozen一打,再比如十年decade。这个故事也有意思。Pika周末快乐,感恩节快乐!
燕麦禾儿 回复 悄悄话 这个妈妈很聪明,她的反击方式值得借鉴。:)
laopika 回复 悄悄话 尊严比什么都重要,从你文里学到了一个新单词a dozen,原来英语里也有一打的对应词:)
暖冬cool夏 回复 悄悄话 回复 '麦姐' 的评论 : 麦子好! 麦子说的是,我前面部分没有听到,故此也不知道为什么要问穿什么鞋子去学校这样的问题。这位母亲应该经济能力不错,几十年前买一双$100的鞋,大牌店里,不是一个穷人家母亲的举措。还是有钱才拳头硬:)) 谢谢麦子留言,祝麦子早日痊愈!
麦姐 回复 悄悄话 谢谢暖冬分享的故事,这个妈妈的收入应该还不错,能够让女儿同时有12双鞋,也有能力用花钱买鞋的方式来保护孩子的自信和自尊。这个老师够可恨的!
暖冬cool夏 回复 悄悄话 回复 '南山松' 的评论 : 松松好! 黑人母亲有很强的斗争意识,为平等为女儿不被歧视,用她独特的方式去对抗。碰到这种情况,我们有时会选择退缩。谢谢松松的阅读,周中好!
暖冬cool夏 回复 悄悄话 回复 '7grizzly' 的评论 : Hi, my friend. Thanks for your comment and thinking. True, dignity is endowed to each of us by God, not given by someone. But when people are mercenary, dignity can sometimes be earned:)). The mom fought in her own way and she is a character in my eyes. Thanks again, my friend!
南山松 回复 悄悄话 母亲的行为出人意料,为了女儿的尊严,这100元也是值了。谢谢暖暖的好分享:)
7grizzly 回复 悄悄话 Interesting story. I applaud the black mom but I tend to believe that dignity can never be taken away unless one gives it. Nor can it be bought. "Keep your head up and mouth shut" is good enough.
暖冬cool夏 回复 悄悄话 回复 'Once-always' 的评论 : Oncemm说的是,Very wild imaginations in the dream,and I was caught off guard by your visit. But meanwhile it reflects sth, like untidiness, 马大哈:)) 还记得梦里站在三楼show你们风景,a complete new and strange scene, some castle-like neighbood. Oncemm梦见我在车里,不会是私奔吧:)) 谢谢你的再次到访留言!
刚刚文学城好像crashed了,后来手机又信号不好。
Once-always 回复 悄悄话 回复 '暖冬cool夏' 的评论 : 暖mm,我发现人的想象力在梦里发挥得最淋漓尽致。:)不过梦境总不完美的,不是看不清就是措手不及,这个错那个乱,让自己干着急。。:谢谢暖mm梦见我,我也做过你的梦呢,是在车里一起去一个地方。敢情都是日有所思,夜有所梦。:)))
暖冬cool夏 回复 悄悄话 回复 '菲儿天地' 的评论 : 谢谢菲儿!谢谢你推荐这位作家的自传,这位作家名字很熟悉的,高产作家。这也是我希望女儿能做到的,心大,能容下很多东西。问候菲儿!
暖冬cool夏 回复 悄悄话 回复 'BeijingGirl1' 的评论 : 谢谢京妞,我是听了一半,把后半截再重新写出来。那天听了还是挺感慨的。京妞周二好!
暖冬cool夏 回复 悄悄话 回复 'Once-always' 的评论 : 这个故事只听了一半,估计这个家庭还比较有钱:)
另外我是在门洞里认出你那双眼睛的:)))
暖冬cool夏 回复 悄悄话 回复 'Once-always' 的评论 : 给Oncemm上茶! 啊呀,我做了一晚上的梦,梦见你带着高大英武的他来我家敲门,我是在门洞里问,你是谁,你是Oncemm吗? 然后连忙让你进来,带你参观我家,我家的两层楼变成了三层楼,三层楼上凌乱的到处是衣服,最后送你出门时,脚上的鞋子这样一只那样一只:))。。。我刚刚醒来,还记得梦的内容:)))
其实那天在车上听这个故事时,我感慨的是这个母亲的做法,一般中国人可能就息事宁人了。这种从小培养孩子不怕权威,敢于藐视挑战,我自己做的很不够。告诉女儿这个故事时,告诉了她我的感受,还有就是,不是别人说你不行你就不行了。这个骄傲的母亲值得我学习的。
谢谢你还特意问他的感受,钱如果能买回自尊,给人无声的一击,就值了。有钱就是好:))
谢谢Oncemm的感悟和认真,周二快乐!
菲儿天地 回复 悄悄话 This reminds me the book 《The Color of Water》- autobiography and memoir of James McBride。 暖冬的女儿has a big heart.:)
BeijingGirl1 回复 悄悄话 Nice article, interesting story. Like it!
Once-always 回复 悄悄话 暖mm,刚刚早餐时,跟他讲了这个故事。我问: what’s your takeaway of the story? 他说:a girl needs 12 pairs of shoes, one for each month. :))) 这人就没正经。不过仔细想想,我觉得这个故事里强调的$100其实还是想说sometimes money can buy self-esteem and dignity. 当然还有一层意思是说你没说出来的才是最好的,比如小女孩没说出她妈妈是干什么的。。。哈哈,I think we’re all over analyzing now. To that little girl, it’s just one of the many things her mom had done for her during her childhood.
Once-always 回复 悄悄话 What an inspiring story! The little girl was lucky that she had a wise mom, but I would say that any pair of shoes would serve the purpose. :) 不过这位妈妈的这$100花得值,买来女儿一生的自尊自强。
Once-always 回复 悄悄话 Wow sofa bed today. :)
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