Let's talk about love, shall we? (Fair warning - I am on my second glass of wine, so it could be the wine talking!)

琢磨爱很久了。到底什么是爱？怎样才算爱一个人？

在我看来，爱是 commitment and responsibility. The institute of marriage is against human nature but it imposes commitment and responsibility.为什么这样说呢？ 想一想 在初恋的时候心里是什么样的感觉？天蓝水秀，两个人脸上是多么阳光灿烂！爱一个人是多么简单！Making love 是多么美好！ 可惜的是，that is not love, that's lust. And it is so easy, isn't it? 于是决定迈入婚姻殿堂。不幸的是，一切开始改变了。因为commitment and responsibility are hard. It requires dedication, sacrifice and the most difficult part - letting go of yourself. 美国人爱说的一句话是 "marriage is hard work." 中国人会说 "婚姻要经营"。 听听这两句话就该明白， 婚姻该有多难！

有句俗语说："do what you love and love what you do." 我借用一下， 我说：" marry who you LIKE and try to love who you married".The attraction that you felt will go away faster than you can say "I love you!" But commitment and responsibility stays. It shows up at picking up the kids, getting dinner done, taking out the trash and walking the dog in the morning when it is sub zero outside. And for the very few lucky ones, it could be nice dinners and significant jewelries once a while.

以前听到那些可歌可泣的爱情故事总是不以唯然。 现在明白了，真有那样的爱，是值得付出生命的。For the rest of us, we gotta work at it, for better or for worse.