Yesterday morning around 9:00 AM while we were having meeting in conference room, Secretary brought in food and beverage and also let us know there was an explosion on East 62nd Street and situation was unclear. Our meeting was continued but everyone in the room seemed in a sudden alerting and heavy mood.  No one can blame us because after 9/11 any blast in New York City would stress the nerves of financial district in lower Manhattan and bring back the horrible scene of dust covered human faces running for life with the backdrop of ruined Twin Tower.  

Through the day I got phone calls and emails all over from my worried fiends asking me if I was all right and insisting I should be careful.  I laughed with them even told jokes for ensuring them I was just doing fine.  But privately, I did check items in my emergency backpack underneath the file cabin of my office and added a notebook and a pen in it this time.  

Connotation of sadness and upset shadowed my mind yesterday and today; Thought about Allison perished in the thin air of 9/11 without even getting a last chance to say goodbye to someone she cared and loved immensely. Wanted to know what would be last notion across her mind.  To be honest, I never could or will understand the mentality of those “nuts".  Why  someone’s hatreds could go so deep to knock  down the building, kill innocent people and shatter other people’s dreams ?  Where could be the justification?  

What an irony, we can send people to the outer space, yet we can’t conquer our inner repulsion to destruct. Sad, powerless, despairing  ...  there is no an adjective  which can adequately describe this contradiction.  

Told myself again, cherish what you got and be disciplined.  In case there would  a tragic event happens  because of wrong time and wrong place; you would not regret since you might have done the best you can each day.