1，餐桌上有一只烧鸡，一只狗跳上去准备吃烧鸡时，主人看见了狗，大声叫道：“你敢对鸡怎么样，我就对你怎么样！！”狗听了后，添了一下鸡屁股…… 

There is a roasted chicken on the dining table. A dog sees it and climbs on to the table, ready to eat it. The owner sees him, and yells, "Whatever you do to the chicken I'll do the same to you!" After hearing this, the dog licks the chicken's butt..... 

2。某村开会讨论改革殡葬节约土地资源，村民们各抒已见。甲说：我建议啊，都不用棺材了，省钱又省地。乙说：我看竖着埋可以更省地方。丙磕了磕烟抢，慢悠悠地说：我看啊，竖着来只埋下半截，连墓碑也省了，一看脸就知道谁死了！ 

During the revolution, the villagers have a meeting on how to save resources for burials. Each person expresses his opinion. A says, “We don’t need coffins, so we can save materials and land.” B says, “I think we can save more land by burying the bodies vertically.” C says, slowly, “What I think is, we should bury them vertically, but only halfway, so we don’t even need tombstones – you’ll know when you see the upper half of the body!” 

3，我一次出去玩，在一个远房亲戚家住了两天。那里有个风俗就是小孩子的尿是最干净的，他们就用童子尿来煮鸡蛋，说是非常养生。我哪里敢吃，无奈人家热情，一直劝我吃吃吃，我没办法只好来了句：我不爱吃鸡蛋。我那亲戚更可爱了，说那你喝点汤吧。 

Once I went to visit some relatives who lived in the countryside. The tradition there is to use children’s pee to boil eggs because the locals believe children’s pee is clean and good for the body. Of course, I refused politely to eat the eggs. I told my relatives that I don’t like eggs. They said, “Don’t worry about it, just drink the broth.”