Last week at a dinner party, the hostess asked me to sit next to Mrs. Rumbold. Mrs. Rumbold was a large, unsmiling lady in a tight black dress. She did not even look up when I took my seat beside her. Her eyes were fixed on her plate and in a short time, she was busy eating. I tried to make conversation.

'A new play is coming to "The Globe" soon,' I said. 'Will you be seeing it?'
'No,' she answered.
'Will you be spending your holidays abroad this year?' I asked.
'No,' she answered.
'Will you be staying in England?' I asked.
'No,' she answered.

In despair, I asked her whether she was enjoying her dinner.'Young man,' she answered, 'if you ate more and talked less, we would both enjoy our dinner!"