1 怎样在火炉旁找个座位/How to get a seat by the fire

Mr. Brown came to an inn on a very cold day, and could get no room near the fire.

He called to the hostler to fetch a peck of oysters, and give them to his horse.

"Will your horse eat oysters?" said the hostler.

"Try him, " said Mr. Brown.

Immediately the people ran to see this wonder, and Mr. Brown who alone remained in the room, chose the best seat by the fire and made himself comfortable.

在一个非常寒冷的日子，布朗先生来到一家小客栈，发现火炉旁边已经没有空位了。

于是，他让旅店的马夫去拿些牡蛎来喂他的马。

“您的马吃牡蛎吗？”马夫问道。

“你试着喂喂吧。”布朗先生回答。

顷刻间，人们都跑去看这一奇观，而布朗先生却独自呆在屋里，他在火炉旁找了个最好的座位，舒舒服服地坐在那取暖了。

2 我有别的选择吗?/Do I have any other choice?

One day, Eve asked Adam, "Do you really love me?" 

Adam said helplessly, "Do I have any other choice?"

一天，夏娃问亚当：“你当真爱我吗？”

亚当无可奈何地回答：“我有别的选择吗？”

3 我从来不会下蛋/I never laid an egg

Author: You can't appreciate it. You never wrote a book yourself.  

Friend: No, and I never laid an egg, but I'm a better judge of an omelet than any hen in this country.  

作者：你无法欣赏，你自己从来没有写过书。  

朋友：没写过，我也从来没有下过蛋，但是我却比这个国家的任何一只母鸡更擅长鉴定煎蛋卷。

4 你们有多少人？/How many people do you have?

An American stepped into a gun shop, "Give me the most powerful pistol."  

"How many bullets do you need?"  

The American walked to a telephone booth, "Hello. Is that the bank? How many people do you have, please?"  

一个美国人走进枪支商店：“给我拿一支威力最大的手枪。”  

“您需要多少发子弹?”   

那个美国人走到公用电话间旁打电话：“喂，银行吗？请问你们有多少人？”

5 我希望/I wish

Wife talking to her husband (who reads newspaper all day): I wish I were a newspaper so I'll be in your hands all day. 

Husband: I wish that too, so I could change you daily.

妻子走到看报纸的丈夫面前说：我真希望我是一份报纸，这样我每天都可以被你捧在手心里了。

丈夫回答到：我也希望如此，这样我就可以每天更换你了！

6 跌落/Falling Down

A man is fibbing away about how great things are in his country. Finally, he starts describing the tall buildings in his country. 

"There is a building so tall, it took my friend Alex 72 hours to fall off it!" 

"Oh, my God!" says his friend. "Surely he must have died!" 

"Of course. He was without food or water for 3 days!"

一个人在吹牛，说他们国家的事情是多么伟大。最后，他开始描述他的国家的高楼。

“有一座楼房特别高，我的朋友亚历克斯用了72小时才从它上面跌下来!”

“哦，我的天啊!”他的朋友说。“他肯定已经死了!”

“当然。他没有食物和水达3天之久!”