1 在珍珠港受伤

While vacationing in the Hawaiian Islands, I visited the World War II memorial atop the sunken U. S.  Battleship Arizona, a monument to those who died in the attack on Pearl Harbor. On board, I slipped on a stairway and injured my thumb.

Back home, with the thumb still not healing properly, I called my doctor for an appointment. When I was asked the nature of my illness, I thought I’d give the background and began," I was injured at Pearl Harbor..."

"Well,” the nurse interrupted. “It took you long enough to report it!”

在夏威夷岛度假时，我参观了二战纪念馆。这个馆建在战争中被打沉的美军战舰Arizona号上，以纪念那些在珍珠港战斗中死亡的将士们。参观完上岸时，我在台阶上滑了一跤，把拇指划破了。

回到家后，我的拇指仍然没有愈合。于是，我预约了大夫。去看大夫时，我需要说清受伤的原因。我觉得要想把话说清楚必须要从头讲起，于是我这样开了头:“在珍珠港，我受了伤……，，

“噢，”护士打断了我的话说，“怎么过了这么久你才把它说出来?”

2 公民权力

On the first day of an American history class at Purdue University in Indiana, the professor assigned five chapters on civil rights.  The next day, he asked one of my classmates to name ten of those rights.  When the student made no response, the professor said, "ALL RIGHT. Name five. "Still the student said nothing. Finally, the exasperated professor begged, "Just name one right you have as a civilian."

To a room full of laughter, the young man replied, “I have the right to remain silent.”

在印地安那州的西拉法耶市波督大学，我上的第一节美国历史课的那天，教授讲了五章关于公民权利的课程。第二天，他叫了一名学生让他说出十条公民权利。那个学生一声没吭，教授说:“好吧，说五条也行。”那个学生仍什么也没说。最后，教授绝望地恳求道:“就说一条也成.”

对着哄堂大笑的课堂，那个学生回答说:“我有权保持沉默。”

3 谁是主宰

Driving our family to a new restaurant, I took several wrong turns.  When I finally found the right road, I asked my husband, "Why didn't you tell me I was lost?"

"I thought you knew where you were going, “he replied. “You always know where you're going when I'm driving.”

我开车带着全家去一个新开业的餐馆。路上我拐错了好几个弯儿。最后，我终于找到了路。这时我问丈夫，“刚才你为什么不告诉我迷路了?"

 “我以为你知道该往哪儿开呢!”他回答道:“因为平时我开车时，你在旁边总说你知道该怎样走。”

4 知音

After friends of mine landed at busy Newark Airport, they were unable to attract the attention of any porters to help with their luggage. In desperation, the husband took out a five-dollar bill and waved it above the crowd.

In an instant, a skycap was at his side. "Sir," observed the porter, ”you certainly have excellent communication skills."

我的几个朋友到达纽约机场时，好一阵子的工夫都没能找到人搬运行李。正在绝望之际，我丈夫掏出了一张五美元的纸币在空中向人群挥动。

很快，一个高个子来到了他的身边，“先生，”那搬运工说: “您传递信息的水平太高了。”

5 为母亲约会

When the young waitress in the cafe in my building started waving hello every day, I was flattered. She was at least 15 years younger than I.

One day she waved and beckoned to me.  When I strolled over, she asked, "Are you single?"

“Why, yes,” I replied, smiling at her broadly.

“So is my mom,” she said. ”Would you like to meet her?"

在我工作的大楼里有间咖啡馆，那儿的女招待每天见到我都向我打招呼。我因此受宠若惊。要知道她至少要比我小15岁。

有一天，她见到我后，朝我招手示意让我过去。于是，我便走了过去。她问我，“你现在是单身吗?”

 “对，是单身。”我满脸堆笑地说。

 “我母亲也是，”她说:“你愿意不愿意见见她。”

6 有同情心的访客

A big burly man visited the pastor's home and asked to see the minister's wife, a woman well known for her charitable impulses.

“Madam,” he said in a broken voice,” I wish to draw your attention to the terrible plight of a poor family in this district.

The father is dead, the mother is too ill to work, and the nine children are starving.

They are about to be turned into the cold, empty streets unless someone pays their rent, which amounts to $400.”

“How terrible!” Exclaimed the preacher's wife. ”May I ask who you are?”

The sympathetic visitor applied his handkerchief to his eyes. ”I'm the landlord.” he sobbed.

一个高大魁梧的男人到牧师家拜访，他要求会见牧师的妻子，这是一个以有着慈悲心肠而闻名的妇女。

男人用令人心碎的声音说，“夫人，我希望能引起您的注意的是，这个地区有一户人家现在生活特别困顿，父亲死了，母亲也因重病无法工作，九个孩子都在挨饿。他们即将被赶到空荡荡的大街上，如果没有人为他们付400美元的房租的话。”

“这么糟糕！”牧师的妻子惊叫，“我能问问您是谁吗？”

这个富于同情心的访客用手绢拭着眼睛，啜泣着说：“我就是他们的房东。”