南山松
阳光明媚清风起，微波荡漾碧蓝天。
正文
1 Digital Life 数码砚听
The air hostess was in the small kitchen at the back of the airplane preparing the trays for lunch when a little old lady came and spoke to her.
空姐正在飞机后部的小厨房内准备午餐的托盘，一位小个子老太太走过来对她说。
A: Could you please tell me where the ladies' lavatory is in this plane?
请问你能告诉我飞机上的女卫生间在什么地方吗?
B: Yes, madam. It is right at the other end of the airplane at the front.
哦，夫人，就在飞机的那一头—在前边。
(The little old lady went too far. She walked all the way to the front of the airplane, opened the door in front of her, and the captain of the airplane and the other officers. They were all busy at their work and did not see her. She went out again, shut the door and returned to the air hostess.
小个子老太太走过了头，她一直朝飞机的前部走去了。拉开面前的门，看见机长和其他机务人员。他们都忙于自己的工作，没有看见她。她又走了出来，关上门，回到空姐那里。)
A: Oh, didn't you find it, madam?
噢，你没有找到卫生间，夫人?
B: Yes, I did. But there four men in the ladies' lavatory watching television.
我找到了，但是卫生间那儿有四个男人在看电视。
2 Hi-technology 高新科技
Sam is at the airport waiting for his flight which leaves at 6:00. He has forgotten wear his watch，so he looks for someone to ask the time. He spots one man walking past carrying 2 suitcases and sporting a fabulous hi-tech watch，so he approaches that man.
山姆正在机场等候6点的班机。他忘记戴手表，所以要找个人问一下时间。他看到一个人提着两只大箱子从身边走过，手腕上戴的高科技手表，十分惹人注目。于是，山姆走向他。
A: Excuse me, could you tell me what the time is by your watch?
对不起，您可以告诉我现在的时间吗?
B: Sure, which country?
当然可以，您要问哪个国家的时间?
A: How many countries have you got?
您有多少个国家的时间?
B: All the countries in the world.
世界上所有国家的时间!
A: Wow! That's a pretty cool watch you've got there.
喔!您的表简直妙极了。
B: That's nothing. This watch also has a GPS facility. It can even send and receive fax and e-mail. Besides it can receive NTSC television channel s and display them on its miniature active color pixel！LCI screen!
这不算什么。这块表还有一个全球定位系统装置。它甚至能收发传真和电子邮件。还有，它能接收N制的彩电频道并在其袖珍液晶显示屏上显示!
A: Boy, that's incredible. I wish I had a watch like that one. You wouldn't consider selling it by any chance?
好家伙，这简直不可思议。我也想有一块像这样的表。您不会想要卖掉它吧?
B: Well，actually the novelty has worn off by now，so for $ 900，if you want it，it's yours!
实际上，这已经不新奇了，所以如果您想要，给我900美元，它就是您的了!
(Dam can hardly whip out his checkbook fast enough and hands over a check for $900. The seller takes the watch and gives it to him.
山姆匆忙开了一张900美元的支票，递给那人。那人摘下手表交给山姆。)
B: Congratulations，here is your new hi-tech watch! (handing the 2 suitcases over as well) And here are the batteries!
祝贺您，这是您新的高科技手表!(然后把两只箱子也递给山姆。)给您，这些是电池。
3 Exam考试
Professor is handing out the examination papers to a roomful of students.
教授正在给全班学生发考卷。
A: You will have exactly two hours. Under no circumstances will I accept a paper given to me after the deadline has passed. Do you understand?
你们有整整两个小时的时间，超过规定时间交上来的考卷，不管什么原因，我绝对不收，明白吗?
B: Yes.
是。
(After two hours.两小时以后。)
A: Time is up.
时间到。
B: Wait.
等一下。
(About 15 minutes later. A students come to the platform and give his paper to the professor.
大约15分钟以后，一个学生走向讲台，并把卷子给了教授。)
A: Didn’t you hear what I said?
你难道没听到我说的话吗?
B: Yes，I did. But do you know who I am! Professor?
不，我听到了，但你知道我是谁吗，教授?
A: No.
不知道。
B: Terrific.
太好了。
Then he stuffed his paper into the middle of the pile.
然后他把他的考卷塞进整堆考卷中。
4 Doctors’ hunting医生们打猎
This story is about another five doctor who went duck hunting one day. The five doctors were a general practice physician，a pediatrician, a psychiatrist，a surgeon and a pathologist.
这个故事是关于另外5个医生的故事，一天他们去打野鸭，这五个医生包括一个全科医生、一个儿科医生、一个精神病医生、一个外科医生和病理学家。
A: Look，a bird is coming winging overhead.
看，一只鸟在头顶飞过。
B: Why did you raise your shotgun and then hesitate?
你为什么举起枪又犹豫了呢?
A: I am not quite sure it's a duck，I think that I will have to get a second opinion，but the bird was long gone.
我不敢肯定那是不是鸭子，我想我必须听听另一医生的诊断意见。但这时鸟飞走了。
B: Look! Another duck.
看!另一只鸭子。
C: Why don't you shoot at it?
你为什么不打它?
B: (Muttering) I am also unsure if it is really a duck in my sight and besides，it might have babies，I'll have to do some more investigations.
(喃喃自语)我也不能肯定那是不是鸭子。并且那只鸟可能还怀着小鸟，我必须作进一步调查。
C: But the creature make good its escape.
但是那家伙从容不迫地逃脱了。
(Next to spy a bird flying was the sharp-eyed psychiatrist. Shotgun shouldered，he was more certain of his intended prey's identity.
然后，是眼尖的精神病医生看到了飞鸟。用肩顶住枪托，他比其他人更清楚自己瞄准的猎物是什么。)
D: Why do you hesitate since you know it is a duck?
既然你知道那是只鸭子你还犹豫什么?
C: Now，I know it's a duck，but does it know it's a duck?
是啊，现在我知道那是只鸭子，可它自己知道吗?
(Finally，a fourth foul sped past and this time the surgeon's weapon pointed sky wards. BOOM! The surgeon lowered his smoking gun and turned nonchalantly to the pathologist beside him.
最后，第四只鸭子快速地飞过。这次是外科医生把猎枪对准了天空。“嘣”一声枪响，外科医生放下枪口还在冒烟的猎枪，扭过头，面无表情地对身边的病理学家说。)
D: Good to see if that was a duck，will you?
去看看那是不是一只野鸭，可以吗?
5 The Storm of Movies 电影风暴
Mr. and Mrs. Jones seldom go out in the evening. But last Saturday, Mrs. Jones want to go to the cinema.
琼斯夫妇晚上很少出去。可上星期六，琼斯太太想去看电影。
A: There is a good film at the cinema tonight. Shall we go and see it?
今晚电影院有场好电影，我们去看吗?
(Mr. Jones was quite happy about it. So they went and both of them enjoyed the film very much! When they came out of the cinema, it was al-ready 11 o'clock. They got into their car and began driving home. It was quite dark.
琼斯先生对此感到非常高兴。于是他们便去了，他俩儿都喜爱这部影片。当他们从电影院出来时已经11点钟了。他们赶紧上了车，开始朝家开去，天色很黑。)
A: Look，Bill. A woman is running along the road very fast, and a man is running after her. Can you see them?
快看，比尔!有个女人正沿着公路飞快地奔跑，后面还有一个男人在追她，你看见了吗?
B: Yes, I can.(Driving the car slowly near the woman) Can I help you?
是的，我看见了。(把车慢慢地开到女人身旁)我能帮助你吗?
C: No, thanks. My husband and I always run home after the film because whoever gets home late will wash the dishes.
不，谢谢。我和我丈夫每次看完电影之后总是跑着回家，因为谁最后到家，谁就要洗盘子。
6 Birthday Party 生日派对
On a special Teacher's Day, a kindergarten teacher was receiving gifts from her pupils. First, the florist's son handed her a gift.
在教师节里，一位幼儿园教师正在接受孩子们送给她的礼物，首先花匠的儿子递上他的礼物。
A:I bet I know what it is...some flowers.
我敢打赌我知道里面是什么……是一些花。
B: That is right, but how did you know?
是的，可是你是怎么知道的呢？
A: Just a wild guess.
瞎猜的。
(The second pupil is the candy store owner's daughter. The teacher hands her gift over head.
第二个学生是糖果店老板的女儿。老师把她送的礼物举起来。)
A: I bet I can guess what it is...a box of candy.
我敢打赌我知道里面是什么，是一盒糖果。
C: That's right. But how did you know?
对了，但你怎么知道的?
A: Just a lucky guess.
碰巧猜出来的。
(The third gift is from the liquor store owner's son. The teacher holds it over head but it is leaking. She touches a drop of the leakage with her finger and tastes it.
第三份礼物来自于酒店老板的儿子，老师把它举起来，但有液体漏了出来，她用手蘸了一滴漏出来的液体，尝了一下味道。)
A: Is it wine?
是果酒吗?
D: No.
不是。
(The teacher repeated the process touching another drop of leakage to her tongue.
老师又用舌头尝了一滴漏出来的东西。)
A: Is it champagne?
是香槟吗?
D: No.
不是。
A: Now, I give up. What is it?
好吧，我猜不着了，里面到底是什么呢?
D: A puppy.
是一只小狗。
点点好！很高兴你开心：）
周末快乐！
哈哈，never try to taste something that you don't know:)
Yanyan, have a nice weekend!
嗯，雪花，you never know what's inside~~~
雪花，周末快乐！
Yes, it is too cool~~~
Rebecca, have a nice weekend!
问好小小，周末快乐！