There I was sitting at the bar staring at my drink when a large, trouble-making biker steps up next to me, grabs my drink and gulps it down in one swig.

"Well, whatcha gonna do about it?" he says, menacingly, as I burst into tears.

"Come on, man," the biker says, "I didn't think you'd cry.  I can't stand to see a man crying."

"This is the worst day of my life," I say.  "I'm a complete failure.  I was late to a meeting and my boss fired me.  When I went to the parking lot, I found my car had been stolen and I don't have any insurance.  I left my wallet in the cab I took home.  I found my old lady in bed with the gardener and then my dog bit me.  So I came to this bar to work up the courage to put an end to it all.  I buy a drink, drop a capsule in and sit here watching the poison dissolve; then you show up and drink the whole thing!  But enough about me, how's your day going?"